Come Together Page 24

In a second, the room is filled with the heady aroma of frying food and rancid drains.

  I glare at Jack before retreating to the bathroom to calm down. I sit on the toilet seat and count to twenty. Breathe. Come on. Deep breaths. You can handle this.

  Jack’s unpacking his bag when I come out.

  ‘All right?’ he asks.

  No. I’m not all right. You’ve brought me to the worst holiday destination in the known universe and I’m truly gob-smacked at what a cheapskate you are, I feel like saying. However, I don’t because I’m a mature adult. Instead, I sulk. But next to Jack, I’m clearly an amateur.

  ‘Jack?’ I ask eventually.

  ‘Yep?’

  ‘Are you going to talk to me?’

  ‘I am, aren’t I?’

  I’m determined not to give up. ‘Come on. It’s ridiculous having this atmosphere between us.’

  ‘What atmosphere? I’m not the one creating an atmosphere.’

  I put both hands to my head and push my hair back. ‘Will you sit down for a moment?’

  Jack chucks his T-shirt on the bed and sits in the chair. He folds his arms and pouts. He looks like a dodgy criminal being questioned in a police station.

  ‘I was really worried when you didn’t turn up this morning,’ I start.

  ‘I told you. I had a hangover,’ he interrupts. ‘I was up drinking with Matt.’

  ‘I thought Matt was at a stag do.’

  ‘He went at about eight.’

  ‘So what did you do?’ I know I’m sounding like the Spanish Inquisition, but I can’t help it. What he’s said doesn’t add up.

  ‘I stayed up drinking alone.’ Jack looks up at me, his eyes narrowed scornfully.

  ‘You got drunk because you couldn’t get hold of me?’

  ‘I got drunk, Amy, because I wanted to.’

  The bitterness of his tone startles me. ‘Oh Jack, you’re thinking the wrong thing,’ I say. ‘I mean, what I think you’re thinking isn’t actually what—’

  ‘Just spit it out. Whatever you want to say, just say it.’

  ‘There isn’t anything to say. You know I saw Nathan last night.’ Jack looks away and sucks in his cheeks. ‘But only for a few drinks,’ I continue. ‘Not even dinner. I left him at half past nine because he had a date with another girl at a nightclub. So I went to H’s.’

  ‘How gutting for you.’

  ‘Jack, please. I’m telling you the truth. I wanted to see Nathan to catch up. Nothing happened between us. I told you. He’s a friend. Like Chloe is your friend.’

  ‘I’ve never shagged Chloe,’ he reminds me.

  We stare at each other for a moment and I know I’ve lost. I have no choice but to dismount from my moral high horse. I let my hands fall to my sides. ‘Jack, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gone. I realised that when I saw him.’

  ‘Very platonic and innocent, was it?’ His voice is dripping with scorn.

  ‘Yes it was.’

  ‘You could have called me.’

  ‘I know. I meant to, but I lost track of the time. Then I did call you from H’s. It was two o’clock. Your phone was engaged.’

  Jack rubs his eyebrow with the heel of his hand. ‘Well, that all sounds very plausible to me.’

  ‘It’s true!’ I protest. ‘Ring H, if you don’t believe me.’

  ‘There’s no need. I’m sure she’ll back you up.’

  I grab his arm. ‘Jack.’ I force him to look at me, but he turns his head away and I drop my hand away from his arm. I can feel the tears swelling in my chest.

  ‘This isn’t fair. I’m not putting up with you punishing me when I’ve done nothing wrong.’ I look up at the ceiling and laugh bitterly. ‘You know the ironic thing? I trust me. When I saw Nathan, the only thing I could think of was you and how much I’m committed to you. I shouldn’t have gone because I knew you didn’t feel okay about it. I was being stubborn, Jack. I admit it and I’m sorry. But I’ve done nothing wrong. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. I thought you knew that.’

  I have to get out of here before I suffocate. I pick up my bag.

  ‘Amy, wait.’ Jack stands up and leans against the door to bar my exit. ‘I’m sorry. Okay? I don’t want you to go.’

  I try to stop my chin trembling as he gives me his explanation, but it won’t. It’s just as I suspected: Jack overslept. I spent two hours this morning squeezing myself through an emotional mangle and all the time he was asleep!

  Sometimes, I really hate men.

  ‘Do you want to go?’ he asks.

  I shake my head and let my bag drop to the floor. ‘No! All I want is for today to start all over again,’ I blurt.

  ‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry,’ whispers Jack, enfolding me in his arms. He plants kisses in my hair as he rocks me. After a while, he pulls me down on to the bed, yanking the blanket over the top of us.

  ‘Close your eyes,’ he murmurs in a hypnotist’s voice. ‘In a moment the alarm will go off. When it does, you will wake up and remember nothing about the last few hours. You will experience a feeling of lightness, of calm and tranquillity. Your boyfriend will have ceased being a wanker, your holiday will begin with joy and laughter, your sense of humour restored. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring!’

  ‘Okay, okay!’ I laugh, pulling the blanket away, gasping for oxygen. I kneel up and straddle him.

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he says again. He looks back to normal. He looks like my Jack.

  ‘Me too.’

  ‘Friends?’

  ‘Friends,’ I nod, before lifting up his T-shirt. I shuffle backwards and lean down to kiss his stomach. I can feel his muscles tense as I turn my face and rest my cheek on his skin. I breathe in his smell, relief overwhelming me.

  ‘What’s that?’ I ask, noticing a red mark near his belt. I put my finger on it.

  ‘What?’ asks Jack, sitting up abruptly. He looks horrified as he pulls the skin of his stomach taut and looks at the mark.

  ‘Don’t worry,’ I say, laughing at his vanity. ‘It won’t spoil your tan. It’s probably just a mark from carrying the bags.’

  I push him back down on the bed and kiss the red blotch, before repositioning my head. Jack feels tense and I can tell he’s staring at the ceiling.

  ‘Are you thinking what I’m thinking?’ I ask.

  ‘I dunno. What are you thinking?’

  ‘That this is the worst hotel room I’ve ever been in.’

  ‘No, I wasn’t thinking that.’

  ‘What then?’

  Jack sits up and swings his feet off the bed. ‘Food. I’m starving.’

  Jack’s hypnotist’s skills work. After a massive breakfast, our good humour is restored fully. He announces a holiday policy of maximum fun, minimum time in the hotel room. At first, I’m reluctant and beg him to change hotels. In Fantasy Island, we would’ve spent every afternoon in bed, lazing around in air-conditioned bliss, before drinking Martinis on our private beach at dusk. But Jack’s not familiar with Fantasy Island. He won’t hear of moving. Actually, I don’t know what’s got into him, but he won’t hear of anything. Jack is … Motor Mouth.

  ‘Sod the hotel. I know it’s basic, but that’s the point, we’ll use it as a base. Let’s explore. It’ll be fun,’ he gushes.

  ‘But—’

  ‘Oh no. Please don’t tell me you’re one of those girls who wants to spend every day on the beach reading soppy novels? Please, please, please. Tell me you’re cooler than that.’

  ‘I—’

  ‘It’s settled then. We’ll hire a moped and we’ll go and see what there is to see. I mean, there must be places to see. This is Greece. Birthplace of art. This is myths and temples and stuff.’ He waves his arms around and grins at me maniacally.

  ‘But Jack—’

  ‘And you mustn’t worry about me driving. It’s fine. Because I know sometimes safety is an issue, but I’m very safe. I promise you.’

  ‘I wasn’t—’

  ‘Excellent. Let’s go,’ he says, standing up and holding out hi
s hand.

  I look at him quizzically. ‘Are you okay?’

  ‘Totally. Never finer. Raring to go.’ He grabs my hand and my fingers automatically fold through his. He closes his eyes for a second as he kisses my knuckles. ‘You’ll see. This’ll be the best holiday, I promise.’

  After a while, Motor Mouth calms down, but I’m still conscious that something is different about him. It’s not that he’s odd towards me – he couldn’t be more flattering or tactile – but for three whole days we don’t have sex. He treats me as if I’m his playmate, not his lover. It could be to do with the fact that we arrive home each night exhausted. Single beds and sunburn don’t help either. But still there’s a nagging doubt that he doesn’t believe me about Nathan.

  I decide to go along with it and not to push the issue. He’s a bloke. And if I know Jack, it’s only a matter of time before his hormones get the better of whatever’s bugging him. Besides, there are fringe benefits to this period of abstinence. Because Jack and I talk. Really talk. And we have fun. The space that we would otherwise have filled having sex is filled with exploration. Not just of the island, with all its fragrant olive groves and dusty tracks, but of each other. Jack may not give me his body, but he gives me something far more valuable in those first few days. He gives me information. Over the jugs of sangria in the small tavernas we find, he tells me about his ideas for his pictures and how he hates having to do commercial commissions to keep himself financially afloat. By the time we drive back to the hotel each night, I’ve fallen for him a little bit more.

  But on the fourth day, everything changes. Because on the fourth day, our quest for the perfect beach is over. We both spot the small cove at the same time from the coastal road and for ages we can’t work out how to get there. Eventually, we abandon the moped and climb down through the rocks, until we find some rough steps cut into the cliff.

  When we get to the bottom, it takes my breath away.

  Fantasy Island, eat your heart out. This is paradise.

  Within seconds we’ve stripped off and we’re racing each other into the sea. The water is turquoise blue and so clear I can see my toenails. Jack dives under the surf and comes up from beneath me, grabbing me as he surfaces. It’s the first time our bodies have been in such intimate contact for days. I hook my legs around his waist. His eyelashes are clumped together and his eyes sparkle in the reflection of the water. I smile at him.

  ‘This is gorgeous,’ I sigh, looking back towards the shore. There’s not a soul in sight.

  ‘You’re gorgeous,’ he replies.

  I push my hand back through his hair and kiss him gently. I can’t stand it any more. This abstinence thing is killing me. Anyway, it might be dangerous. Perhaps you can damage yourself permanently if you go around feeling this horny.

  ‘Come with me,’ I whisper, pulling him back through the water.

  ‘Where are we going?’ asks Jack.

  I’ve seen 10. I’ve seen Against All Odds. I’m determined to have sex in the shallows. Even if it means rape.

  But it’s not rape. It’s as far from it as you can get. When we start kissing, the waves lapping at our legs, I can feel something change in Jack. It’s as if all the passion he’s been holding back for the last few days is released. I don’t know how many times we’ve had sex since we’ve been together, but they all pale into insignificance compared to this.

  Jack makes love to me. As if he’s all my idols rolled into one. And it might be sandy and it might be too hot, but when we come together, it’s catapulted up there into the number one slot.

  This is my best shag. EVER.

  ‘Wow!’ gasps Jack, when our senses finally come back to earth. He kisses my eyelids, my nose and my cheeks, as if I’m the most precious thing in the world to him. I touch his face and he opens his eyes. That’s when I feel it rush through me like adrenalin.

  Jack’s eyebrows knit together. He looks as if he’s about to cry as he pushes a sandy rat’s tail of hair out of my face. ‘Amy, I…’ he starts.

  ‘Shhh.’ I smile, putting my fingers to his lips. Because for once, there’s no need for him to say it. Because I know.

  The next couple of days are spent in beach bliss. Late one afternoon when we get back to the room Jack massages moisturiser all over me. I feel so relaxed that before I know it I’ve fallen asleep, naked on the bed.

  I wake to a soft scratching noise.

  ‘Don’t move,’ says Jack.

  My whole body tenses. ‘Please tell me it’s not a spider!’

  Jack laughs. ‘No. Just stay still, I’m nearly finished.’

  ‘Finished what?’

  ‘Wait and see.’

  The scratching noise continues for a while and then I hear Jack coming to the bed and sitting down next to me.

  ‘Is it all right if I move now?’

  ‘Yeah,’ he says, and I roll over to face him. ‘Here you go.’ He hands me a piece of paper.

  I stare down at the pencil drawing he’s done of me. It’s wonderful.

  ‘Do you like it?’ he asks.

  I reach over and kiss him. ‘I love it. How long did it take?’

  ‘I don’t know. You’ve been asleep for about half an hour.’

  I look back down at the sketch. Do I really look this happy when I’m asleep?

  Jack is watching my face. ‘I haven’t done you justice. You looked so beautiful.’ He reaches out and strokes my cheek.

  The thought of him painting Sally flashes through my head, and I can’t help wondering if he was this intimate with her.

  ‘I bet you say that to all the girls,’ tease, but fail to conceal the edge to my voice.

  ‘There aren’t any other girls. Not any more. Just you.’

  I put the drawing down on the table and pull him towards me and we lie together on the bed. I believe him. Fully. I believe he’s mine and, as I breathe him in, I’ve never felt so content.

  We kiss and I fondle his hair. ‘Thank you,’ I whisper. ‘Come on, I’m going to treat you to dinner.’

  Jack smiles at me and sits on the edge of the bed. I watch him as he pulls on his shirt. I pick up the drawing again. I can’t decide whether to kiss it, or kiss him, they both mean so much.

  A week is never enough for a holiday. Everyone knows that. But I only remember when Friday comes around in about five minutes. I’m just relaxing, I’ve just got a good tan, and we’ve got to go home. It’s not fair.

  On our last night, we dress up and have dinner at our favourite taverna.

  ‘Stop sulking,’ teases Jack, as he pours me some retsina.

  ‘I don’t want to go back,’ I moan. We’re sitting on the terrace above the bay. The only light comes from the candle on the checked tablecloth and the full moon hanging like a lantern above us.

  ‘Yes you do,’ he laughs. ‘You’ve got the new job to look forward to and a top tan to show off. You’ll love it, once you’re back.’

  The waiter comes and we chat for a while. He asks us about our holiday and we tell him it’s been amazing. He gives us a big show of disappointment when we tell him we’re going home tomorrow.

  When he’s gone, we both lean on the wooden balustrade and look out at the canopy of stars.

  ‘You’re right,’ sighs Jack, eventually. ‘Let’s just pack everything in and stay here permanently.’

  ‘You’re on,’ I say, sitting up and turning round to face him.

  ‘We’ll find a villa up in the mountains. You can spend all your time dedicated to growing warts and a moustache,’ he jokes, ‘and I can make sculptures out of goat dung.’

  ‘What if we get bored of each other?’

  ‘Well if we do, there’s always the goats for me. And I’m sure there’ll be lots of young fishermen happy to attend to your needs.’

  ‘Excellent. Let’s stay.’ I lean over and kiss him.

  ‘It wouldn’t work. I’d have to keep you locked up, just for me,’ he whispers.

  I hold his hand against my cheek. ‘Thank you for keep
ing your promise.’

  ‘Which promise was that?’

  ‘To give me the best holiday.’ I kiss his palm. ‘It has been.’

  Jack puts his finger on my nose and smiles. ‘Hey you. Don’t get soppy on me, we’ve got a feast to eat yet.’

  We drink two carafes of wine before we notice that it’s gone midnight. I’m as stuffed as the stuffed vine leaves I’ve consumed.

  ‘We should go back,’ says Jack eventually, when the waiter hands us our bill. As usual, we’re the last to leave.

  ‘I don’t want to.’

  ‘What are you talking about? We can’t miss the FunSun disco. Anyway, I want to try my hand at the karaoke.’

  ‘You don’t,’ I laugh.

  ‘Didn’t you know? You’re looking at the Karaoke King.’

  ‘What would you sing?’ I ask.

  ‘“Summer Nights” – obviously.’

  On the way back to town, I hum it as I rest my cheek against Jack’s back. I’m so happy, feeling the warm breeze through my hair, that it takes me a while to notice that we’re on the wrong road.

  ‘Where are we going?’ I ask, sitting up, as Jack turns off down a track.

  ‘You’ll see,’ he says, stopping the bike and pushing down the stand.

  He leads me through some rocks, until we come out on to the cliff top. ‘I had to have one last look,’ he says. Below us, framed between two olive trees, is our beach. I’ve never seen it from this angle before. I stand, mesmerised by the moon and the silver shimmer of the water. Jack stands behind me and puts his arms around my waist. I breathe in, the air thick with scent and the sound of cicadas.

  This is perfect.

  At last. I’ve found the ‘it’ I’ve been looking for.

  ‘Jack?’ I whisper.

  ‘Hmm,’ he says. I can feel him bury his nose in my hair.

  ‘Do you feel it too?’ I ask.

  ‘What?’

  I can feel my heart thumping. ‘That this is right. That we should be together. That this is serious?’ I can’t believe I’ve said something so important, but I mean it. More than anything I’ve ever said.

  Jack squeezes me tighter and his head drops to my neck. I reach up and fondle his hair, but he takes my wrist to stop me. I turn around to look at him, taking in the features of his face and the way the moonlight falls across his cheekbone. I know that he’s about to say it. This is better than any of the movie moments I’ve had in mind. My knees are trembling as I hold my breath. ‘I think we should go,’ he says, not looking at me.